July 22nd, 2011 - Part 2
Jul. 22nd, 2011 02:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thewalkI've said this many times before, but I think it's ridiculous that they call this "summer vacation." The kids still come to school until 1 o'clock every day, but they label the classes as part of "special course week," and suddenly it's summer vacation? These kids are getting screwed.
Anyway, there ARE still some indicators of summer vacation. The daily info white board is up, the teachers are around less, the clothing is more casual...and sensing these little changes makes me nostalgic. I think back to last year, when I'd cross my fingers that they'd let me out early, that no one would show up in my work circle so I'd get some privacy, or that some new project I could help with would crop up. Summer vacation is boring when you're the ALT sitting in the office alone, and yet also kind of fun because there's no expectations and a boatload of time to do personal or creative projects. I like the down time, and also the time to sit and chew the fat with teachers. It would have been even better this year on account of how close we've all become this year compared to last year.
And of course, I also remember the excitement of the summer of 2010 and that makes it even harder. I was just getting rolling in my new job as a leader in the ALT prefectural council. I was looking forward to meeting the new ALTs and to all the potential they bring with them. I was looking forward to my summer of outings. Hob-knobbing. Seeing the people I never get to see...and that won't happen this year. I'm already rejecting facebook invites to the August and September gatherings in Hokkaido and it hurts.
But, yes, I'm going home. I'm starting over and that's pretty exciting too. I'm going back to the people who loved me first - and probably more than my current people do besides.
Still, what I had at this time last year was golden. I remember all the train rides full of anticipation. The quiet reflection on how far I'd come and how I wanted it to last forever. All the close friendships I was making. It was the first time I was really in control of my life AND satisfied.
I will miss this.
But, shit, I'm too young for the regrets and bitter smile memories of an elderly woman. I will give myself a few weeks to feel this way after I've gone home, and then I expect to get back to that place. I did it once, against all odds, you bet your ass I can do it again.
I'm pretty sure, anyway.
Anyway, there ARE still some indicators of summer vacation. The daily info white board is up, the teachers are around less, the clothing is more casual...and sensing these little changes makes me nostalgic. I think back to last year, when I'd cross my fingers that they'd let me out early, that no one would show up in my work circle so I'd get some privacy, or that some new project I could help with would crop up. Summer vacation is boring when you're the ALT sitting in the office alone, and yet also kind of fun because there's no expectations and a boatload of time to do personal or creative projects. I like the down time, and also the time to sit and chew the fat with teachers. It would have been even better this year on account of how close we've all become this year compared to last year.
And of course, I also remember the excitement of the summer of 2010 and that makes it even harder. I was just getting rolling in my new job as a leader in the ALT prefectural council. I was looking forward to meeting the new ALTs and to all the potential they bring with them. I was looking forward to my summer of outings. Hob-knobbing. Seeing the people I never get to see...and that won't happen this year. I'm already rejecting facebook invites to the August and September gatherings in Hokkaido and it hurts.
But, yes, I'm going home. I'm starting over and that's pretty exciting too. I'm going back to the people who loved me first - and probably more than my current people do besides.
Still, what I had at this time last year was golden. I remember all the train rides full of anticipation. The quiet reflection on how far I'd come and how I wanted it to last forever. All the close friendships I was making. It was the first time I was really in control of my life AND satisfied.
I will miss this.
But, shit, I'm too young for the regrets and bitter smile memories of an elderly woman. I will give myself a few weeks to feel this way after I've gone home, and then I expect to get back to that place. I did it once, against all odds, you bet your ass I can do it again.
I'm pretty sure, anyway.
